Rewind

I can’t think of a clever way to seamlessly lead up to my announcement, so here it goes:

I’m officially a college student once more.

(What did you think I was going to say??)

This past Thursday was my first day back in school. I’ve gone from a Big Ten school to a much smaller school without a football team. From living in a dorm to commuting to college. (If anyone seriously needs some advice on the college experience, I’m probably your girl. And whatever I can’t draw from personal experience, I know someone who probably has.)

And now, from obtaining a B.S. to a B.A.

I know what you’re probably thinking. You’re probably scratching your head and going, “Whaaaaat? What do you mean that your first degree is in Human Biology? All you ever talk about on this blog are books and writing projects.”

Yeah. Well. That should have been you’re first hint at where my true passion is.

So now I’m working on my Creative Writing degree. Because this is my second bachelor’s, it’ll only take me three semesters to complete this and I can skip out on all those pesky gen-eds/pre-reqs. I can totally handle that.

I wish I could say that I thought long and hard about this for months, but that would be a lie.

It’s true that I may have gone back and forth between two degrees of the opposite academic spectrum while I was at MSU, but in the end, I was too scared to switch out of biology when I was already so close to completing it. At the end of my junior year, I made the decision to not ever go back to school once I graduated. I was going to be done.

And so, for the past two years, I was dead-set on never sitting in another classroom again.

But then something happened this past April and the seed of returning back to college took root. I did some research for the next two weeks and contemplated the change of heart. I knew that my subconscious must be telling me something when I began to have dreams where I was explaining to people that I was back in school (this was quite bizarre once I woke up and remembered it).

In the end, I was crazy enough to fill out an application in the beginning of July to enroll in the upcoming fall semester.

Now here I am. I’m back in college to refine my writing abilities and, hopefully, have an easier time getting my foot in the door of what I really want to do in life. (Also, I think I may have secretly missed being in school as strange as that sounds.)

But the most important take-away for you, as the dear reader, is this: I can now legitimately dole out writing advice that I gained from my classes.

...And the second most important take-away is this: I better not hear anyone say that I’m not a “well-rounded” person.

Shiny New Idea

I have found the companion of Writer’s Block. It creates the opposite effect; however, they produce the same results.

Like I mentioned in my last post, I was doing quite well with my writing project. I got to 67k by the end of July and then I spent the first weekend of August out of state for a mini-vacation. So once I got back, I took a break from writing and instead sorted through all the scenes I had written and placed them in order, right into the actual Word document that contains the official story. I then managed to figure out what I needed to write in most of the not-yet-written chapters (I guess you could call them “bridge” chapters because that’s essentially what I feel like they are.)

Therefore, all I basically had to do was to write those remaining chapters (which would certainly surpass the 75k mark), edit the heck out of, and then declare the project finished. (I don’t intend on publishing it in any way, so I could skip the peer editing stuff.) I may not have finished it in the middle of August like I originally planned, but it was still possible to complete it before September.

But then early in the week of August 10th, I got slammed with Writer’s Block’s companion.

Shiny New Idea. (Otherwise known as: SNI)

Shiny New Idea provided my brain with a few new characters and their particular story arc, along with scenes. SNI forced me to jot these ideas down on pieces of paper and next thing I know, I’m drawing a rough sketch of the world map. I’m currently in the middle of making up names and physical character descriptions.

Good-bye fantasy/adventure/action story that I was working on since June. Hello anthropomorphic saga!

Ugh. I was so close to finishing that writing project that I could taste it.

But it doesn’t matter now because I’m currently obsessed with the saga story. Why must you do this to me, brain? Why? I was almost done with that previous story. I can’t give up on it now.

So I guess I’m taking a break from that writing project? It frustrates me that I’ve sort of turned my back on it and I know that, in time, that Word document is going to taunt me with the fact that it’s not quite finished.

Darn you, SNI! You’ve successfully prevented me from finishing another writing project.

I just have to keep reminding myself that I have never not finished a large writing project. And that’s exactly what that fantasy/adventure/action story was. I will complete it eventually…even if I have to make myself the goal of seeing it to the end before the start of 2016.

In the meantime, I’ll be working on my new story.

Vocab Words

When I was in elementary school, we were given a list of words each week that we were required to spell and eventually define. I used to do quite well in this “class”. Once I reached junior high, however, the spelling tests started to die down. I remember receiving vocab words each week in seventh and eighth grade, but I don’t think anyone ever really enjoyed these spelling tests. (I may have been the only one in seventh grade who got a kick out of the assignment where we had to incorporate each new vocab word into a sentence…I just thought that it made me appear so smart.)

After eighth grade, though, my English teachers decided to do away with the spelling tests. I was relieved because I started to view them as an annoyance. I mean, weren’t spelling tests such an elementary thing?

However, those vocab words showed up once more when I entered AP English in twelfth grade. It started out as something fun, I think. My teacher would write on the corner of the whiteboard the word-of-the-day found on dictionary.com. Eventually, the list of words grew longer and he figured that we, the students, should make more of an effort of learning them. I want to say that we had vocab tests every 2-3 weeks, but I honestly can’t remember anymore.

And then I went off to college and that was that.

Except…ever since May, I’ve been keeping a list of words that I previously didn’t know the definition of.

I don’t know why I suddenly have this fascination. Every time I run across an unfamiliar word while reading a book, I instantly drop what I’m doing and pull up a dictionary. Afterwards, the word and its definition gets placed into a Word document and I try to memorize it so that one day, it will seamlessly enter my lexicon. I will not have it disappear into the great memory-loss abyss, spinning away before it gets a chance to become long-term memory. (By the way, did anyone else see Inside Out recently? Great movie.)

Anyway, something must be working because when I was reading my book yesterday, I came across a word on my list. Magnanimous. You have no idea how excited I got for myself for instantly knowing the meaning of this word.

But it still doesn’t beat the word that started it all: ululate. It’s such a fun word to say. However, it has more of a negative action/meaning: to wail or howl in grief (could also be used to describe the howling or screeching of an animal).

Is all of this vocabulary love nerdy? Yeah, probably.

Do I care? No, not really.

Does anyone else have a favorite “sophisticated” word? (I know that “defenestrate” is popular. Which I don’t blame anyone because I like this word, too.)



P.S. In my last blog post, I briefly talked about my new writing project. Well, in case you were curious, last night I reached the 63k mark. So it’s going quite well and I’m starting to wind it down. My goal is to reach 75k, but we’ll see how many more words it’ll take me. I’m still on track to complete the whole draft by the middle of August.

Completely Random (Also: Overcoming Writer's Block?)

As you can tell by today’s date, today is the last day of June. As the day was approaching, I kept thinking about possible blog post topics because I promised myself that I would write at least one post every month.

But I continued to come up with nothing.

In fact, this is not the only thing that I happen to experience Writer’s Block with. For the past two weeks, I’ve also started a new writing project. And while that’s been going well, I have been encroaching the 20k word mark (as of last night, I’m about 900 words away) and I’m suddenly running out of steam. I have a nifty chart that I made that pretty much gives me a general outline on how the story goes, but I think I’ve officially completed the “beginning”. So now it’s time for me open up a new Word document and start writing some out-of-order scenes. But my problem is that I don’t know where to start.

Back to the blog, though…I figured that I would just include a bunch of random fun things that I’ve been reading on the internet for the past day or so. Sort of like a “fake it ‘til you make it”.

And I realized something as I was thinking about which articles/sites I should include in this post. (Keep reading past the randomness and I’ll eventually tell you what it was that I realized.)

So here is some stuff that I got a kick out of:

1.) Letters between F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway

I don’t know why I found this so amusing. Maybe because I could see myself doing this with some of my own friends.

2.) How old are the teens on teen novels?

When I was a child, I used to look at the “teens” on tv shows and marvel at how grown up they looked. Once I got older, I understood why shows hired older people (something about how it’s easier to sign contracts with people who are 18 or older).

However, I never really took a good look at the models that were being portrayed on YA books. And the website that epic reads used to do this experiment is definitely something that I could spend a lot of time wasting.

For example, just for fun, I tried out the most recent photo of myself saved on my computer (took it back in March) and it claimed that I was 26 years old. Totally threw me off because usually I get mistaken for 18-20 years old. (I’m 22, by the way.)

And what was even more hilarious was that I tested the profile picture of my blog and it claimed that I was 36. Man, lighting is everything, I guess. (This was the oldest that it pegged me as. Every other time was in the twenties.)

So clearly how-old.net has some work to do, but it was still fun.

3.) TIME’s Answers issue

I’m a curious person by nature, so reading all these answers to questions that I never really thought about asking were very enlightening.

Like, I never thought about space having a smell. (It supposedly smells like seared steak or a hot meal.) Or that America’s greatest personal fear is not public speaking, but walking alone at night.

4.) The importance of being disconnected

I was browsing this blog the other day (I “know” him from a youtube channel that I’m subscribed to) and this idea totally makes sense. I can’t tell you how many times I would think of something that would contribute to a story that I was working on while I was in the shower. Also, many times after I write creatively for an hour, I have stand up and walk away for ten minutes to just think. Good stuff.



Anyway, to bring you back to my earlier statement…

I realized that I came up with a blog post topic when I was allowing my brain to do other things. Things that made me laugh and ponder and let my mind roam free with a billion other curious questions. I’ve also been busy having a social life for the past few days (crazy, I know), but it’s forced me to take a break from all things writing simply because I just haven’t had time.

So I’ve decided to give myself permission to take a day or two off from working on my current writing project. Instead, I’ll be brainstorming scenes on how to move forward with the story. I mean, it’s not like I have to reach a deadline; I just have a goal of finishing it sometime in the middle of August. I have to stop being so rigid with my schedule.

In conclusion, I’ve learned to take a step back when I’m struggling with Writer’s Block. To give myself a break and then dive back into it as soon as possible.


Unless you’re one of those people who really is on a deadline. To you, I say: Just keep going.



P.S. Special thanks to YA Highway for leading me to find those entertaining websites for number 1 and 2 listed above.

Competitiveness

Head’s up: This is a more serious post.

I’m not a competitive person by nature.

When I play board games, I aim to win, but it means nothing to me if I end up in last place after all. When I was in school, I never really tried to get better grades than my friends – I just wanted to get good grades for myself. And I’m not even going to go into sports…(I don’t think I possess an athletic bone in my body.)

But when it comes to writing, all bets are off.

I’ve read two books in the last two weeks that have set off my “jealousy” alarm. (I won’t say which novels they were.) I read the words that these authors have written and I’m in awe at their use of descriptions and their writing style. And it makes me want to flop onto my bed and wonder if I’ll ever reach their level.

But once I’m done pitying myself, I can guarantee you that I’m pulling up a new Word document and typing out a new story. Of course, I make an effort to incorporate whatever it was that made me jealous in the first place. I try to prove to myself that I can write just as well as that particular author.

How dare anyone – either published authors or former classmates of mine when I was in school - try to one up me?

And so, this line of thinking has gotten me pondering about why anything that has to do with writing brings out my competitive nature.

I’ve reached a couple of conclusions, but perhaps it’s a little bit of all of the following reasons: 

     1.) My writing is personal; therefore, I want it to be written in the best way I possibly can.

     2.) I hope to one day publish a book and when I look at other writer’s work, I think about the fact that that is what I’ll have to compete with.

     3.) Because writing is the one skill that I’m confident I do a fairly decent job in and I want to continue to prove that.

So, yeah, a part of me wants to keep getting jealous while I’m reading books because it pushes me to better myself and my craft. But at the same time, it’s such a nasty emotion.

…For those extremely competitive people, I have a question to ask of you: Why are you that way?

Is it the brief euphoria of winning something, of being superior? (Clearly I don’t possess this personality trait of external gratification.)

And despite being competitive, is there one thing that you’re ultra-competitive in?


For some reason, I find all of this fascinating.

Random Thoughts While Re-reading ANIMAL FARM

First off, I promise that this post will contain NO spoilers.

So I decided to re-read ANIMAL FARM by George Orwell this week. I have read this book probably about 3-4 times in the past, but I don’t think that I’ve read it since I was in high school. (Side note: I first read it in eighth grade and then even wrote a paper in ninth, analyzing the book in relation to Communism.)

I had forgotten how short the novel actually is. I did a rough calculation and figured that the book was about 39,000 words. That’s it. That’s like the length of a middle school book.

Part of me was wondering if that was normal back in 1946. But then a part of me was wondering if this was originally supposed to be a short story. At any rate, Orwell managed to pack quite a punch in such a short length (which gave me something to think about when it comes to my own writing).

Speaking of ‘back in the day’, my ANIMAL FARM copy was originally my dad’s book that he picked up when he was a kid back in the 60s. It’s sort of difficult to see in the picture below, but the price tag in the upper right hand corner amuses me.

Do you see that? The book cost 95 cents. Less than a dollar!

It’s an antique! (I’m just kidding. Sort of.)

Anyway…

Despite me not reading this book in a few years, it still fills me with disgust and disbelief at how the pigs (mainly Napoleon, but Squealer certainly helped tremendously) managed to manipulate the animals. And how the other animals went on believing it anyway.

And Boxer’s ultimate demise still tears away at me (no spoilers!).

The most gut-wrenching chapter of them all (and there are only ten chapters) was clearly the last one. As I was reading it, I kept thinking, “No. That did not just happen.”

Looking back from reading this book when I was thirteen (which was not a required reading, by the way; a friend was reading it in her class and recommended it), I think this was really the first novel where it didn’t have some sort of happy ending. Everything just got worse and worse until the animals were right back where they started initially.

It frustrated me back then. Nowadays, when I find myself writing stories, I notice that I typically include some sort of mix; some characters get “happy” endings, but others in the same story don’t.

And I wonder if that is the result of me shedding my child-like thinking while I was growing up, beginning to view the world where some things just aren’t fair.

…How’d I get on the topic of childhood psychology from ANIMAL FARM?

Whatever. Just read the book. It’s a classic.


P.S. I’m sorry for the excess use of parentheses that I included in this post.

Brick Wall

So...I realize that it has been a month since I last posted on this blog. I've come to realize that I'm doing bad in the "post-more-than-once-a-month" department.

It's not that I've forgotten about this blog. I just feel like I have nothing interesting to say. I don't even have a possible topic that I could create a more structured post.

Basically I feel like for the past two weeks, I've hit a brick wall.

Nothing too terribly exciting has happened in my life in the past month.

I mean, I could talk about:

*The music that I've been recently obsessed with (Marina and the Diamonds' new Froot album)
*The most recent book that I finished (BURNING KINGDOMS by Lauren DeStefano)
*The fact that it's now considered spring (I'm happy it's now roughly in the forties and even fifties now, but it has been raining all week long and I hate being out in the rain.)
*my new writing project (I spent the last week and a half brainstorming and I finally started writing yesterday. Don't bother asking me what it's about.)

I don't know. I just feel like I've been in this weird funk lately. Like I've been walking in this cloud of fog for the past couple of weeks and every time I try to do something proactive/useful, I keep hitting this mental brick wall.

How do I overcome this?

By doing something out of the ordinary?? Wait it out? Try something new?

Yeah. I got nothing. Let's just hope that the fog dissipates come next week.


P.S. To reward you for reading this rambling of a small blog post, gaze upon this adorable picture:

I. Want. Him.